The “Serrat del Vent” is located in Taverted (Catalonia), and with its 4.273m, has the curiosity of being the worlds’ longest stoneware cave. Was discovered in 1979 and connected both exits in 1985 (at least it was the longest ‘till not long ago, but I’m sure now it isn’t).
Anyway, the thing is that after having all the necessary permits and a kind of pulley they lend us from the Federació Catalana d’Espeleologia, we were able to open the door. I had to hold it myself with my right arm for a while until they found something to block it with (with my left arm I was preparing one of several machineguns we brought. After having seen the movie ‘The Descent’, you never know what you’re gonna find inside!!hahah).
We never go caving without an ice axe or a gun, we’ve many times found monsters inside, or even worse…spaniards.aaagghhh!! haha.
The heterogenous group started entering (Carles P., Ramon, Toni…) and we started following the water pipe (that supplies the nearby village) to the darkness. After crawling through a small tunnel and squeezing through a small flat hole, we divided the group in two, to go faster. Carles and I started walking-running till after a few minutes I shouted I couldn’t go on like this. (It’s always the fat guys fault!! pfff) The neoprene was heating me and even had to sweat myself alive up the first and only pit!! Solution: No upper neoprene!! Fuck it!! I can stand frozen water, no problem!haha. Everything much better afterwards.
There are two entrances on this cave, and somewhere in the middle there’s a really selective
narrow hole that allows u to go from one end to another. I don’t think we would be able (beer bellies are not good companions! Haha) besides, I had to go to a ‘Cock Sparrer’ concert that night. So our aim was just to get to the middle, and then back. We kept a good pace and managed pretty well, trying to find our way in certain spots, climbing up some waterfalls (without that much water). When arriving to the middle, the cave starts twisting more often and keeps on getting narrower and narrower, till we finally got next to the point, so we went back.
There are two entrances on this cave, and somewhere in the middle there’s a really selective
narrow hole that allows u to go from one end to another. I don’t think we would be able (beer bellies are not good companions! Haha) besides, I had to go to a ‘Cock Sparrer’ concert that night. So our aim was just to get to the middle, and then back. We kept a good pace and managed pretty well, trying to find our way in certain spots, climbing up some waterfalls (without that much water). When arriving to the middle, the cave starts twisting more often and keeps on getting narrower and narrower, till we finally got next to the point, so we went back.
We went faster on the way back, I wore less and less equipment, a bit more and I end up doing naked speleology..mmmm…naked caving! Now I’m getting really hot!! I’m gonna get undressed while writing this, I hope you don’t mind!hahahha. Ok, no more laughs, now comes the serious part, the one were we met a group of Spanish Forces of Occupation. 
I was with Carles, descending a pit when I heard a whisper from behind a rock. Everything was dark but a saw a glimpse of an eye when staring at the darkness…it was an ambush!! I quickly got the AK-47 and started shooting without mercy. The impulse of the shooting made me spin around hanged on the rope. I could feel the blood from the enemies splashing on my face and started shouting like a possessed: GO ON HOME BASTAAAARDS!!! Carles started throwing hand grenades. When I ran out of ammunition I was a perfect target, so I got my knife, cut the rope and fell the 15m to the lake. When falling I was able to reload and when I got to the surface to breathe I shot them all down. Suddenly…silence…I only regretted not to keep one alive to torture him the same way they have been doing with impunity for so many years. 
Hard to believe, eh! I know but reality sometimes beats fiction. But let’s keep it a secret, I don’t want police to come asking questions now. What happens underground, stays underground!
We made it out and went to the bar for a few beers, in a complete filthy state. That’s about it...
Hard to believe, eh! I know but reality sometimes beats fiction. But let’s keep it a secret, I don’t want police to come asking questions now. What happens underground, stays underground!
We made it out and went to the bar for a few beers, in a complete filthy state. That’s about it...
After this funny story, the real disaster is that Catalonia keeps on being an occupied colony of spain, the same as all our brother nations without state!! Fuck off you imperialist bastards!! I know this has nothing to do with the text, but I’ve suddenly enraged! 
CATALONIA SOLIDARIZES WITH IRELAND, THE BASQUE COUNTRY, QUEBEC, SCOTLAND, OCCITANIE, GALIZA, CORSICA, LA BRETAGNE…On continue le Combat!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5bXcgF73AY
VISCA LA TERRA LLIURE!!
CATALONIA SOLIDARIZES WITH IRELAND, THE BASQUE COUNTRY, QUEBEC, SCOTLAND, OCCITANIE, GALIZA, CORSICA, LA BRETAGNE…On continue le Combat!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5bXcgF73AY
VISCA LA TERRA LLIURE!!
